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posted by [personal profile] towith at 01:32am on 24/03/2009 under
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Honesty is paramount. Better to be miserable with the truth than happy, ignorant swine.

First I would confront the person causing the problem, in this case the significant other. I would explain to them clearly and in no uncertain terms that I am leaving the problem in their hands, citing a specific amount of time/conditions before I confront the friend. For that agreed amount of time I would avoid the friend. Obviously if the friend were to come to me for advice I would instantly confront them.
There are 14 comments on this entry. (Reply.)
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] savagemind.livejournal.com at 05:48am on 24/03/2009
I don't know...

Imagine there's a giant meteor plummeting toward Earth that will wipe out every last cell of life in two days. Would you want to know? Not like you can do anything about it.

Imagine you're the astronomer who spots it...

I'm not sure if I'd want to know and I'm not sure if I'd tell.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 01:11am on 25/03/2009
If you had to put a dollar value on an hour of your time now and a hour of your time 2 days before you died, how wide would the discrepancy be?
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] savagemind.livejournal.com at 04:07am on 25/03/2009
You know, I had this conversation with a friend once and he raised that very same point. After much thought, I came to the realization that I've never valued my time more when I felt I had less of it. Deadlines don't make me enjoy my work any more, so I can't say that a deadline of life would make me appreciate my existence either.

I know we all like to think that we'd experience some existential awakening in that situation, but that's wishful thinking if you ask me. I think we'd all be panic-stricken and paralyzed with fear. Even if all we did for those few days was walk the dog, go to work, and sleep in we'd probably get more out of it than if we knew the horrible fate that awaited us.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 04:22am on 25/03/2009
"Deadlines don't make me enjoy my work any more"

Does not follow. Your impending doom would be the antithesis of work and arbitrary deadlines do not convey this mode of scarcity.

Speaking as someone who has been hit by a car and caught in turbulence between pockets of freezing fog, I experienced instant calm. Not an existential awakening, but an acceptance of that we cannot control. That is subjective of course. While I would enjoy my last moments, you indeed may spend them in a futile attempt to relieve panic.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] savagemind.livejournal.com at 04:35am on 25/03/2009
I'm not talking about the euphoria that everyone feels in times of near-death thanks to a rush of chemicals, I'm talking about a scenario where you really have time to contemplate your mortality. It's easy enough to say that you would be calm, but I doubt very much that you would. Never mind enjoy it.

If you think you are at such an enlightened state that you'd peacefully accept whatever fate the universe throws at you, there's a few billion of us who'd like to know your secret.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 04:54am on 25/03/2009
I was not referring to euphoria. I only wish it were a secret I could easily impart, I suspect however that there is simply a vast gulf between our personalities.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] savagemind.livejournal.com at 04:57am on 25/03/2009
In other words, no dice.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 10:53pm on 25/03/2009
I wouldn't say it is quite that desperate. Mantras, mindfulness, objectivism, cognitive behavioral therapy, stoicism, cynicism, there are a million methodologies which attempt to take the panic-stricken and give them perspective. The most virulent of all being age and experience.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] savagemind.livejournal.com at 11:48pm on 25/03/2009
In that case we're both going to be screaming our faces off when we hear the news.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 12:01am on 26/03/2009
False reasoning. Would you really scream?
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] savagemind.livejournal.com at 12:10am on 26/03/2009
A bit. Probably. Maybe I'd just hug everyone I saw. I can't really say with any certainty what I'd do. Nobody can. Hell, maybe I would climb up on my roof and meditate, embracing my fate as I wait peacefully for the world to end. I can only say that I don't know, and neither do you.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 12:41am on 26/03/2009
No one knows any experience-based knowledge, hence the discussion in the first place.

I do not know what I would do, but experience and internal monologues tell me that I would not panic.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] zombienought.livejournal.com at 06:49am on 24/03/2009
What astounds me is that anyone has to think
about this. A friend who wouldn't tell me is
no friend at all.
 

Nil

posted by [identity profile] towith.livejournal.com at 03:30am on 26/03/2009
I would not be so quick to judge without first a formal explanation.

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